A Funny Email We Received...

A teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-Gebra is a problem for us," the Attorney General said. "They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values." They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.

As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'.

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that the Nobel Prize for Physics will follow.

TSA revises LASP proposal

TSA revises LASP proposal

06-Jan-2010

By Matt Thurber

While the business aviation community may have been hoping that the Transportation Security Administration’s controversial Large Aircraft Security Program (LASP) would go away, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano testified last month that the TSA plans to issue a supplemental notice of proposed rulemaking (SNPRM) “before the end of 2010.”

LASP, as originally proposed in October 2008, would require all operators of Part 91 aircraft with an mtow of more than 12,500 pounds to create a TSA-approved security program (see article page 12), put all flight crew through FBI criminal history background checks, compare all passengers against the TSA’s watch lists and impose new restrictions on carriage of certain items in the cabin.

Napolitano told the Senate aviation subcommittee that the TSA will incorporate the input from GA stakeholders that it has sought throughout its rulemaking process for the SNPRM, including five public meetings, and hold “additional comment outreach sessions” with affected stakeholders to gain further input and feedback.

Late last summer, the agency re-engaged its aviation security advisory committee (ASAC), a part of the TSA that is charged with recommending improvements in security methods, equipment and procedures for civil aviation.

Government and industry officials received an update on the proposed LASP that was rescinded earlier in the year after a storm of overwhelming negative comments, which some have estimated at nearly 7,400. Napolitano said the TSA received 8,000 comments in response to the initial NPRM.

NBAA enlisted members to testify before Congress about their concerns with LASP. In July, Martha King, co-owner of association member King Schools, told the House subcommittee on transportation security and infrastructure protection that general aviation operators are concerned about security measures that sacrifice liberty without benefit to society.

“This proposal does not recognize the significant differences between airline operations and noncommercial operations, which do not carry members of the general public,” she explained. “General aviation operators personally know everyone on their aircraft. I believe general aviation security would be best enhanced by having the TSA establish a rulemaking committee to address the questions and concerns raised by industry and the public on the LASP.”

Source: AIN Online